10 baby names I love but won’t be using.

I’ve seen loads of people doing these on YouTube and let’s be honest, I have nothing else to do until Baby Rara puts in an appearance so I thought I’d do one. 

We are Team Yellow so no idea if we need to be picking boys or girls names so we have a fair sized list of potential names. In the future we may end up using one of these names but for now they are just backups. We have really struggled with boys names. Our girl name we’ve had picked out for about 4 years! But we only just decided on a boy name about 3 or 4 weeks ago so the boys list is mainly ones I like and Rara doesn’t as we couldn’t agree!


1. RILEY. This was front runner all the way up until a few weeks ago. Rara suggested it months ago and I really liked it. But as time has gone on he convinced himself the name wasn’t right. I was unwilling to let go of the name until he found an alternative, so lucky for him he did!

2. KYLO. I’m not going to lie, Rara agreed to this a while back for about 10 seconds and swiftly changed his mind. I have never been able to shake it from my head. I love it! But his concern is that it’s too much to name your child after Kylo Ren haha. I would 100% be using this name if he would let me! I also heard it was quite popular last year, but that doesn’t help as Rara wants unusual but not ridiculous names, so if there were a few thousand Kylo’s last year that wouldn’t persuade him to go with it.

3. ARLO. This is one I suggested and Rara never really liked. I’ve heard of quite a few baby Arlo’s recently and I just think it’s such a cute name for a little baby. It’s not one I really pressed for though as I could deffo take it or leave it, but like I said we struggled with any boy names. If there was one I liked even a little bit it was added to the list.

4. BODIE. Another one that I fell for. I actually do really like this one but Rara is not a fan. I’ve never met a Bodie before, it sounds quite American if I think about it so maybe there’s a few more over there?

5. ASH. Not Ashley. Just Ash. Like on Pokemon! Haha I’m pretty sure that will be where Rara got the inspiration for this name, it’s just one that he threw out there and I didn’t totally hate it. When you say it combined with middle name and surname though it doesn’t roll off the tongue properly.
Albie, Fox, Avery, Amery, Logan, Lennon, Cade, Theo, Abel and Indy were all also contenders. We have weird taste in boy names I know!


1. LUNA. We both said we liked this name a few years ago. I have no idea if Rara still likes it but I’m adding it to the list! Apparently no one else likes this name in my family or people think it’s a cat name but I don’t care! Obviously we like it because of Harry Potter so instantly it’s a cool name right?

2. IVY. I love this name a lot! If we had 2 girls I would consider it as the second name, although it is probably too similar to the name we have decided to go with if Baby Rara is a girl so maybe not. Anyway, I heard this name on a film a few years back and Rara said he liked it too so it’s a contender.
3. ELSIE. This is one of the few girl names that Rara doesn’t like but I do so it’s not one we’d ever use. But I do like it a lot so if it was down to me I’d deffo be considering it. I think girl names I seem to prefer more traditional/older sounding names so that’s why this one is a fave with me.

4. ISABELLA. Not Isabelle, but Isabella. That’s the only way I like the name, 1 letter makes all the difference clearly! I like this name but don’t love it. I feel like it may be quite a common name and it doesn’t sound too unique. Saying that the name we have picked for a girl is probably common and not unique so i’ve made myself sound like a knob now haha.

5. WEDNESDAY/FRIDAY. This is a Rara suggestion and I hate it! He’s pretty much thrown out every day of the week as a suggestion, but he was very persistent with it and didn’t just mention it once! I think he thought it would be quirky but I just don’t like months/days as a first name.

Florence, Violet, Harper, Avery, Adelyn, Harley, Lexi and Pearl are also a few of the girl names we liked.


Overdue life.

I’m still here and I’m still pregnant! I’m officially in those days that no pregnant woman ever wants to find themself in. I’m currently 40+6. 6 days have come and gone since we reached due date. Tomorrow I’ll be a whole week overdue. Fuck my life!

Me and Rara were so concerned about keeping Baby Rara in until September. Oldest in their year, first to turn 18, and we have a huge amount of September birthday’s already so why not add another to the mix. Once we got past 1st September I was happy for baby to arrive. But I had no signs. Well 3 weeks later I’m probably no further along!
Seeing people having their babies that are due after me infuriates me. Seeing people having their baby full stop infuriates me. Even though I know this baby can’t possibly stay in forever and the days inside are numbered, I’m so fed up! Combined with pregnancy hormones, being so uncomfortable I can only leave the house for short stints, being too fat to drive anywhere myself so having to rely completely on Rara and also not fitting in the booths in Nando’s anymore, I’m done! And let’s not even get started on the countless daily messages from people asking for ‘Any news, any signs, is baby here yet, anything?’. I’m so fed up with it! People telling me they are impatient, I’ve known about this baby a lot longer than you, I’ve gone through months of morning sickness, I’ve been counting down to 19th September since January so I know when I’m due! Stop reminding me!

So I’ve had a sweep. Baby is fully engaged. I’ve tried every trick in the book. I can’t get out of bed anymore, I can’t really do anything without Rara helping me. All I can do is have a bit more patience. I have a midwife appointment in 2 days time so I’m hoping she’ll give me some good news. Well in an ideal world, I’m hoping I’ll go in to labour now but apart from being so uncomfortable and every body part seizing up, I have no signs šŸ˜¦

How hard can pregnancy really be?

Obviously I’ve only just got a toe over the third trimester starting line, so I can’t yet speak for a whole pregnancy, but I can tell you of my experience up until now.
I will throw my hands up and confess when anyone that was pregnant or just been through a pregnancy would tell me how difficult they were finding it, I would say all the right things but not really think much of it. Sure it must suck being a little bit sick in the morning before you leave the house for work but obviously the joy of being pregnant would outweigh that. Let me tell you now, when your friend is telling you just how shitty they are feeling, they aren’t over reacting. When they tell you they’ve been hugging the toilet for days at a time, they won’t be lying!

I found out I was pregnant around 4 or 5 weeks in. And I had little to no symptoms other than being ridiculously tired. I could sleep for 14 hours and have had an hour nap in the day, and I’d still struggle to keep my peepers open. But that didn’t make me feel pregnant, just lazy. I remember telling my friend that I was actually ‘Looking forward to little bit of morning sickness so I could actually feel pregnant’. She replied that I’d be regretting that in a few weeks, and rather smugly I sat there assuming I’d be fine. Most people were sick straight away, that’s how they knew they were pregnant. I’d skipped it all clearly! I now realise I was an absolute idiot! Delusional. Naive. Cocky. All of the above and more!

At the time I was working 6am starts at work, so I was always feeling a little sick first thing pregnant or not, as I struggle to eat anything before leaving the house at half 5. But then by some miracle, I managed to get a weekend off work when I was about 7 or 8 weeks pregnant. That Saturday morning, I woke up at about 4am. Brilliant start to a weekend off! So I decided to get up and watch TV after a few failed attempts at getting back to sleep. I felt odd straight away. I made a cup of tea and sat on the sofa. But my stomach was churning and I felt a little dizzy. I absolutely hate being sick and always have done. I will do anything in my power to stop it from coming out. I know it’s weird, and I know you always feel better once it’s done, but I hate it! 
So there I was on the sofa, having had one sip of tea, feeling it rise instantly. People tell you when you have morning sickness to try plain biscuits. So I got a rich tea biscuit, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to look at one again! Within about 30 seconds I had my hands clamped over my mouth and I was running to the toilet! And that was that. Except it didn’t stop. I was puking on and off for hours. And my appetite never came back.

I struggled with morning sickness far longer than I thought I would. People say it’s only a first trimester thing. I had morning sickness until 18 weeks, and still to this day I get occasional days where I feel sick or I am sick or I just gag on certain foods. Last week at 27 weeks my appetite went again out of the blue. I know for a fact that strawberries make me puke now. I have no idea if the baby hates them or what but I was really ill when I decided to have some strawberries for breakfast a few weeks ago. And then the following week the same thing happened again so I’ll be avoiding them until Baby Rara is here!

I also tried all the things people will tell you to try. The problem is, I hate ginger. But I tried ginger biscuits and gingery things, and I threw them up! All plain biscuits had the same effect, as did plain crackers. My Mum told me I had to eat something, I tried some toast, and puked it up within 5 minutes. I tried those travel wrist bands, I still puked. I tried eating in bed before I woke up, didn’t help! You get the picture. In the end I actually lost a stone from all the being sick and not wanting to eat anything. Which then freaked me out and I convinced myself that I was a terrible mother and was starving my child. I would try to eat things for the baby even though I knew they wouldn’t stay put!

Another weird thing associated with food aversions and sickness that I never saw coming was my sudden hatred for the kitchen. I’m sure reading this you may just think I was a lazy bitch, but genuinely the thought of standing in front of the oven and preparing food, or even washing up made me feel sick, I just couldn’t do it! I know it’s the strangest thing! Rara’s Mum ended up making us food in batches and bringing it over because it got so bad. We didn’t have food in the house because I wasn’t eating anything. Poor Rara must have hated me those first few months! I also couldn’t face cleaning due to the fact I wanted to sleep next to the toilet. The only thing that got a good bleaching was the toilet, seeing as it was my new best friend now!

Morning sickness goes hand in hand for a lot of mum’s. Then at 13 weeks my whole pregnancy got flipped around. I was on another early start at work on a Saturday morning. I went for a wee, did my business, happened to look down and noticed my knickers had some blood in. It was a little pinky/brown stain. And I pretty much started panicking instantly. I knew I was well past the point of implantation bleeding. I’d had my first scan, even had a second one as Baby Rara has this wonderful habit of being awkward at every scan we attend. Infact I’d had that second 12 week scan less than 24 hours prior to this bleed. Could something have happened overnight? 

I was literally terrified. I turned to Google straight away and couldn’t find a great deal of helpful info. Being a Saturday and 4:30 am I didn’t stand much chance of seeing a GP. I messaged two of my friends desperately who bath managed to calm me down and explain it was normal. I phoned work and said I obviously wouldn’t be in. And then I rang the NHS Direct number after my sister told me to. I totally forgot about this service, I can’t tell you how amazing it is! I spoke to an advisor who asked a lot of questions about how much blood there was and if there was any pain with it. He then got a GP to phone me back, who advised I went to the midwife on the Monday, but if the bleeding got worse or I got any cramps or pains with it I’d have to pop in to hospital. I stayed in bed binge watching a TV series the whole weekend. Then at 9am on the Monday morning I saw a midwife, who ended up sending me to hospital after finding out my blood type.

At my first midwife appointment I had a million blood tests and things done. I hadn’t heard anything back, but the midwife there said my blood type was rehusus negative and that as I’d had a bleed I’d have to go to hospital and have an Anti D injection. I had no idea what was going on, I’d never heard of any of this. I didn’t even know there was a major difference between positive/negative blood types. Turns out, no one I knew had ever heard of it either!

If you’re interested Google about rehusus negative blood and Anti D injections as I will be useless at explaining it! I did however find out that I have the universal blood type. This is given to people quickly if their blood type is unknown, as generally it is the only one that will not cause a reaction. I had to wait a long time for my Anti D injection whilst they found some blood I’m guessing, but it’s made me think about giving blood once Baby Rara is here.
They don’t test Daddy’s blood type. So there’s a chance that Baby Rara may have a positive blood type if  Rara’s blood type is also positive. So after any bleeds of any kind, they will give the Anti D to the mother if they don’t know for sure what blood type baby has. I believe the first baby isn’t at any threat, but any future children can be affected. I was also told by the midwife that I’ll have an increased risk of miscarriage next time around due to my blood type although I haven’t looked in to this as it’s a scary thought! Anyway, I also need a second injection next month, and possibly one after the birth where there is a greater risk that our bloods will have mixed during labour. I also had an internal examination which was joyful! But just the same as a smear test which luckily I have already had last year so it wasn’t too bad. They couldn’t check heartbeat or anything as I wasn’t far enough along so I came home being told everything was probably okay, but that wasn’t enough for me.

I spent the rest of the week off work. I booked myself a scan for the Wednesday, and as soon as we saw little Baby Rara kicking around, all the worry was gone. I came out of that scan breathing the biggest sigh of relief! I went in to work, showed off the pictures to my manager and arranged to come back the next day. Ever since I’ve been on restricted duties. No lifting, no bending, no standing for 8 hours at a time like I used to on a typical shift. And that’s where I’ve been since. I’m not taking any chances both at work or home since!

In the last few weeks I’ve been having all the usual aches and pains of pregnancy. Some days I struggle to stand for longer than 20 minutes. Some days I want to cry because I have the worst back pain ever. I have bloating, swollen ankles, achey legs, my ring doesn’t fit my fat fingers anymore. I recently spent a whole day in hospital following a week of not being able to catch my breath and extreme heart palpitations. I also have a feeling I’m getting carpal tunnel as the last few days my fingers have been tingly and numb, and I have  an odd pain in the palm of my left hand. So far it’s been fun and games! 

I know this is mega long, most of my posts probs will be, but that’s 7 months of pregnancy summed up in a blog post. I’ve heard the third trimester is when it all goes back to shit haha so let’s see how the last few months go!

The TTC post.

*EDIT. Please do your own research before taking any of the supliments I mention in this post or speak to your GP for advise. It worked for me, but certain things may not agree with you so please check it all out thoroughly before taking anything.*

I’m gonna confess and say that I always love a good TTC blog post. I know I’m nothing but a nosey cow, but i find it fascinating finding out people’s stories. Once we were actually trying I NEEDED to hear these stories.
I do feel like my own TTC story is going to be boring though. When you’ve been with your boyfriend for 5+ years, people are going to start asking the inevitable questions. Anyone that knows my boyfriend will know that there is no rushing him. He is the most laid back, slow paced kind of guy around, the exact opposite of me! If I had my way, we would have most likely had a baby or two by now!

I genuinely have been asking Rara when we can have a baby for years. And for years it’s always been ‘Not yet’ or ‘One day’. Well in April 2016 it was finally time to get my implant taken out after 3 years of unprotected sex without even a second thought. I’ve been on a million different types of pill since I was 18, they all made my blood pressure sky high which is why I was on the implant. But after years of taking contraception I told Rara I’d had enough. So out came the implant. Then we went to Vegas a few months later, so we had said no baby making until after the holiday. 

I can remember being jet lagged and asking Rara a day or two after we got back when we could start trying. He was veering towards the end of the year. I bumped it up gradually over the weeks, and eventually it got to September, and he finally agreed we could start trying after my next period. In those 3 months I’d started taking Seven Seas Trying For A Baby vitamins. I was all set to go, we’d have unprotected sex a few times using my phone app and I’d be pregnant!

That first month when I got my period I was shocked. I knew it was a long shot, but I just assumed we’d be one of the lucky ones. You hear of people getting pregnant on one night stands, so it couldn’t be that hard. I started obsessively googling my symptoms that month, because obviously Google and three year old chats on a message board would have the answers to whether or not I was with child. And whilst googling  this I realised I wasn’t fluent by any means in the world of TTCing. TWW, BFP, BFN, DPO, POASA. If you haven’t had a baby or never been in the TTC game then you will be just as clueless as I was at first!

Then I bulk bought a load of cheap pregnancy tests on Amazon, and I’d do a test pretty much daily until inevitably I’d be gutted when mother nature came calling again. Not going to lie, some days I’d even do a test twice, just to make sure!

Here’s a few things I found out from obsessively googling the subject;

Normal lube kills sperm! I never knew this before, and that first month that’s what we used, so really we never stood much chance! So I ended up buying Conceive Plus the second month of trying. Which Rara decided he didn’t like. So then I ended up forking out for yet another sperm friendly lube called Preseed.

Cervical mucus is actually important! You have to learn to read your knickers! And you will become obsessed over it. And Google it 24/7. I had an app as well that would ask me daily what my cervical mucus was like and would then tell me if that particular type was fertile. I had never paid any attention to this before, but now I realised that actually at certain points of my cycle my body wasn’t producing as much as all the apps and Google searches had told me was normal. After another Google search I ended up buying a few suplimentsā€‹ that apparently would do me some good and sort out my problem. I was willing to take anything within reason so that second month I started taking daily; Seven Seas Trying For A Baby, Evening Primrose Oil, Royal Jelly and Agnus Castus. All in pill form with breakfast.

Caffeine isn’t great for you. I know this one is pretty obvious, but I had a real thing with a daily coffee to start my day from my lovely Tassimo machine. Sometimes I’d have more than one. And that wasn’t including any fizzy drinks or chocolate that also contain caffeine. So that second month I also started to wean myself off coffee. Alcohol has never been an issue for me, I rarely drink as it was so I did stop drinking but not really as I probably only drink a handful of times in a year anyway. 

I think that was the only changes I made. Nothing too drastic really. November was the second month of officially trying. And I had the worst pains on my left side during and after my fertile period. My boobs were hurting from day 1 of ovulation and then my period was late. For all of 24 hours I just knew I was pregnant. I could tell. I felt different from the first month, we’d done it! I woke up the next morning, got a pregnancy test out, went to the loo, and found blood in my knickers. I was gutted. I was so convinced and then I just felt like such an idiot!
I’m pretty sure I was a cow to everyone that week. I’d bought the fertile lube, I’d taken the magic pills, I had what I thought was potential implantation pains, and yet there was still no baby. Even though this was only the second month of trying, I was fed up! 
I told my boyfriend our next plan of action was to have sex every other day after this period, for the rest of the month. I never used ovulation strips or temp checked or anything like that. I would just use my app on my phone. I had about 4 different ones and they all ended up telling me different ovulation days and the fertile windows would differ by a few days, so sex every other day was the only way in my eyes to ensure we got pregnant. In my mind, after all that sex if we still didn’t have a baby at the end of it then there was obviously something wrong with one of us.

I also had a trip down south to visit family and friends before Christmas and I was asking advice from two of my friends who have children. They both told me to forget about it and not stress out, which I hate being told because this was literally all I thought about 24/7! They also both said the times they fell pregnant, they had switched things up slightly and did the deed somewhere other than the bedroom! If that’s what it took, I’d never have sex in the bedroom again!

I will hold my hands up and admit by this third month I was a nightmare. I would remind my boyfriend of our plans that night. ‘Oh you’re going to the pub tonight? Don’t forget to pencil me in before you leave!’. All the fun had been sucked out of trying for a baby. Now it was just something we did as and when I said. However we did migrate from the bedroom on a few occasions, and I’d go waddling back in to the bedroom afterwards with my legs tightly together, and then lay on my back and keep my legs in the air whilst I updated my apps. I have no idea if this works, Google suggested it and I wasn’t one to argue with people that swore gravity got them pregnant! I’d also not wee for at least an hour afterwards. Saying it now, it all seems ridiculous, but you will literally do anything if you want it that badly, and you will listen to anything that worked for anyone else! If someone told me to drink a pint of my own piss and I’d 100% fall pregnant I’d bloody do it!

So by this point we were in our third month of trying and it was Christmas time. Apparently we had sex on Christmas day which neither of us remember, but according to my app we did! I also started a journal writing down symptoms and scribbling a green tick if we’d done the deed that day. On Christmas Day I wrote that I had some pains on my left side again, and it was really uncomfortable to sit. I felt really bloated, even before Christmas dinner! Then on Boxing Day we went to my sister’s. She said we needed to buy a Clear Blue digital ovulation test thingy as my niece was conceived on the first month of trying using this. It basically tells you when to have sex based on a flashing smiley face and I bought one at the table there and then. This would hopefully help us get over the issue of not wanting sex after a month of it every other day took the spark away. Because this way it was only 4 or 5 days you HAD to do it. That sounds awful but we were both so fed up with it by this point! So I ordered this for the next cycle, because I just felt like this month wasn’t the one. I was having the same pains as last month, although my boobs weren’t hurting this time around.

So New Year’s came and went and I was back to work. On 13th January it had been snowing. I had a lift off a colleague and on the way back I had said how on New Year’s Eve we both fell asleep before midnight and didn’t go out. I was thinking about how I had actually penciled in sex before going out but we never got round to it. And then in my head I decided right there and then that when I got home I was going to do a pregnancy test. I knew I was 2 or 3 days late for my period but I wasn’t optimistic. Every month I was certain I was pregnant and I wasn’t, so why would this month be any different. And I felt totally normal. I was moody and hungry and had all the signs that dear old Aunt Flow was on her way! But I had been so good and not tested at all this cycle so I could allow myself just one test.

It was just gone 3pm when I did the test. I was so convinced that nothing would come up that I left the pregnancy test on the side whilst I went and made a cup of tea, instead of obsessively sitting there waiting for the result to change in my hand like I usually did. Or holding it up to the light desperate to see that second line, that was another favourite of mine!
Anyway, I came back to the en suite, I hadn’t even reached the door way and I could see a mile off there was two lines on that test! I ran the rest of the way in and picked it up. And then my heart started hammering. We had done it! I was finally pregnant! We we’re going to have a baby! I started shouting and swearing and waving the test around in Rara’s confused face!

I felt like it took us ages and ages, but really we started trying in October and by Boxing Day we were actually pregnant so not that long at all. It takes over your life though and you obsess over it. I spent every day constantly googling and asking silly questions for months on end, and typically the one month I was more excited for Christmas than anything else and really didn’t think it was our month at all, ended up being the exact opposite!

Another blog about kids!

I’ve started following a lot of Mummies on Insta since I found out I was pregnant and a lot of them have blogs. I love reading TTC and Mummy blogs and the further along I get in this pregnancy the more I see myself sitting here nodding my head in agreement with certain things and finally understanding what it is they’ve been banging on about all this time! 

So I thought I’d give this a go. I’m totally expecting that this won’t get updated frequently, it will just be as and when I have something to say. For now I can only really post about TTC and my pregnancy so far. And then you’ll have to sit tight until the baby is here for more updates!

I think there is pretty much only one thing you need to know before going any further. And that is what we’re calling this baby until they arrive; Baby Rara. I’ve been with my boyfriend nearly 6 and a half years, and I’d say I’d given him the nickname Rara within a few weeks! I have no idea how or why. It has no meaning. I just said it one day and it stuck, so this baby was always going to be Baby Rara really.

So I’ll be posting about TTC and throwing out some more of those lovely abrieviations that you will only understand if you’ve been in the business yourself!